The worthiness gap

In life and in work we talk a lot about glass ceilings, and we should, they’re bullshit. But there is another type of ceiling that gets a lot less attention, and it’s responsible for a lot of unrealized potential— the ceiling we place on our own worthiness.

I’ve watched 22-year-old dudes with OK brains and no experience go FULL THROTTLE at their dreams. I’ve watched them confidently ask millionaires to invest in them. I’ve watched them screw it up. I’ve watched them, jaw gaping, shrug it off and try again. They fail right on up.

There is something in there that many of us have never experienced— feeling a deep sense of worthiness from a very young age. Those brotatoes believe with every bone in their bodies, that they are worth investing in. That they are deserving of success and money and fame. That if you don’t give it to them, they’ll find someone who will.

I don’t know many women, people of color, or queer people like that. We haven’t been trained for that entitlement. We don’t have the shelving for that blinding self-esteem. We qualify our dreams. We ask what is possible, what is logical, what do I deserve.

I call it the worthiness gap. Those of us on the margins aren’t born believing unequivocally in ourselves. We have to work at it. We have to actively stop ourselves from limiting our growth. We have to train our brains out of thinking small.

Here’s something I want you to try: think fucking BIG.

What could you do if you believed that you deserved not just a slice of the pie, but the whole damn thing? Write it down. Don’t temper your ambition, let it flow out of you. Allow yourself the space to explore the edges of your potential.

Now close your eyes and say this with me:
I am capable.
I am worthy.
I am powerful.
My potential is vast and I will participate fully in realizing it.

Make it a mantra. Say it every day.

Now go into your Wednesday with the confidence of a 22-year-old Travis, and slay.