On letting go of friendships

Good morning gorgeous. Wrap yourself up in a cozy blanket and pull up a chair, we have some catching up to do. I want to talk a bit about relationships to kick off this hump day, my dear. Something I’ve learned in my 30s is that sometimes, we need to let go.

My mom taught me to hold on to friendships, to remember birthdays and try to make it to as many baby showers as possible, to call and check in, and to spread the love. I still believe most of that (my mom is a smart lady) but not everyone reciprocates the effort it takes to maintain a relationship.

Some of them want to commiserate when things are going badly but vanish when things are going well.
Some of them want to bask in the light when things are shiny but vanish when the darkness inevitably comes.
Some of them want the rewards of friendship but refuse the work.
Some of them are just waiting for their turn to talk.

That’s OK. Not everyone deserves to be in your circle. Put your energy where it feels good, where it’s deserved and reciprocated. Then, gently let go of the people who don’t hold you up. Send them love, and let them fade into your background. Your circle will become smaller, more joyful, and more powerful.

Then, show up for the people you love. When they are going through hell, when they need a cheering squad, when their marriage or business fails, when they are celebrating cool shit in their lives.

Watching someone open bridal shower gifts is a Jordan Peele scripted nightmare, GET (ME THE FUCK) OUT. Baby shower games are low key torture and should be outlawed in at least 89 countries, and not every friend-hosted event is great— but we show up anyway.

Set the bar high. Surround yourself with those who support you, tell you like it is, and love you. Then, show up for them.